It’s so easy to get focused on serving the physical needs of your child—providing for them, making sure they have what they need.
And while this is important, the focus on that puts us in a mental space, constantly tracking what needs to be done.
This attention can take us out of present time and put us into future planning. And again, while this layer is important in parenting, your children need more than just a parent that manages.
We are wired for connection. As mammals it’s our baseline of existence.
And all you mamas who birthed a child can recall those first days and months where beingness was what your baby most needed.
A safe regulated nervous system that they could rest into.
So while the manager is an important layer of parenting, if we’re not also energetically attuning to our children, then there’s a huge miss in connection.
"So while the manager is an important layer of parenting, if we’re not also energetically attuning to our children, then there’s a huge miss in connection."
Cultivating a capacity to slow down, breathe and be with our children both in their big upsets, and also in their space of curiosity and play is energetic attunement. It’s our ability to meet them in the present moment, which is where they are residing.
Not having their big upsets trigger dysregulation inside of you is a practice.
It’s a practice of shifting from a mental “doing” state into the emotional field. A field that’s one of all embracing love and empathy, so they can feel heard, seen and met. They want to be empathized with first, before going into “fix it” mode.
And not only do they want to feel emotionally met, they also need to feel an unwavering stability coming from you.
And energy that transmits “I’ve got you, no matter what.”
When this occurs, magic occurs.
A child’s system naturally finds its way back into regulation because it has been emotionally met, and energetically held, as a wave of emotion moves through them.
This is energetic attunement with your children (and partners).
As you read this, do you notice this feels challenging for you? Does it kick up resistance? Or confusion or overwhelm? Or something else?
If so, that’s a clear indicator that your system did not receive this kind of attunement when you were a child.
It’s pointing to parts of you that are still frozen in your body, aching to have this kind of energetic attunement. And as we thaw out these internal frozen parts, our capacity to meet our children in this energetically attuned space increases.
It’s that simple. If you're longing to show up with more presence with your children, you need to give that to yourself first. On a daily basis.
Like changing any pattern, it’s through repetition that new pathways are laid down. It may feel like bushwhacking at first, but over time, the path becomes clearer. And the other path you were doing before becomes overgrown and no longer in sight.
Our big feeling, highly intuitive, new earth children are simply shining the light of awareness to the places in you that are ready to be liberated, so you can truly meet them, see them and attune to them. It begins with your own liberation.
If you'd love support on this path of becoming a more attuned parent, stay tuned for my next 4 week online course with The Liberated Child!
Big love and delight, Mandalena
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